228 | Armpits, Fingers and Butts: Mia Schachter’s Sex Stories

How can we be enthusiastic about something we’ve never done before? Mia Schachter (33 white genderfluid trans, poly-ish, single person, intimacy coordinator) shares what it’s like to be low-shame with the superpower of distilling complex topics into clear and audience-appropriate bits of sharable information, which is part of what makes them an excellent consent educator—or rather, consent wizard. But work is in the background in this episode: Wyoh and Mia talk about discovering their affinity for armpits, partners who love petting, how fun sex with friends is, exploring delicious sexual dynamics, sex as an artistic medium, love and sex and trust creating psychic experiences, straightforward invitations for erotic partnered experiences, mental turn-ons, considering a partners’ definition of sex, how hot humping and grinding with clothes on like teenagers can be, giggly and thrilling experiences around partners even when talking about sex is your job, learning to calibrate our own neuro-perceptions while navigating relationships, and the harmful binaries of consent education. Mia reflects on formative experiences, learning about sex and that it could include pleasure, but it seemed gross. They describe themselves as a late bloomer, then share details of bad first experiences, eventually discovering fun, playful sex before deciding to put effort into queer dating. Mia tells a story about hiring a sex worker to salvage a relationship that was flailing due to improper anal etiquette and gives details about why butt stuff is so intimate for them, how they came to teach consent, understanding their trans identity, and why working as an intimacy coordinator on Hollywood sets has been overall disappointing—and what it was like to learn about health and consent and trauma as they were undergoing their own healing for lifelong health stuff. And then there was a tapeworm. And two and a half years of NO sex. And now it’s a new era of dating apps (Hinge and Raya) and self-expression: Mia plays Music as Max Silver, is working an a song about dating profiles that will open their future musical—and they play us a preview!!!!

🔗 MIA LINKS | linktr.ee/consentwizardry / consentwizardry.com / instagram

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